OK so I know I haven't been the greatest poster child of commitment this year. I'm about to turn 26 and I'm pretty sure I have no idea where my life is going, and well, I'm not feeling overly excited about school. I feel like I'm missing motivation to be there. There are people that would kill to go to school, and yet I'm just exsisting there. I'm floating.
That being said, I have never been one to take anything sitting down, or slack off, until this year. And tonight I hit an absolute low point. I knew an assignment was due tonight. I had it done and ready to roll. Come time to hand it in an apparently I had ignored the parts actually due. I missed a big chunk of the assignment being due and I have NEVER had this happen before.
I have never not handed something in on time. I have never missed an exam, or had to write it at a later date. I have never called in sick to an exam. I DON'T DO THIS. I'm not late! I'm not someone who does these kinds of things and yet tonight I somehow handed in half an assignment because I wasn't paying enough attention to class and the syllabus to actually realize everything was due.
I felt so stupid! So irresponsible! How could this have happened? This isn't me?
Have I been too distracted and lazy lately? To really be paying attention to things like this? And if that is the case how pathetic is this? And shameful? I'm spending all this time in school hoping to get some sort of clue as to what to do with my life, and I'm pissing it away by not being dedicated?
So I'm very mad at myself. This assignment was worth 15% of my grade and in class the prof said it was either you get 15% or nothing, and seeing as I only did half I have no idea how this marking is going to go. I have emailed (had to rush after class) and asked about handing it in tomorrow and just taking a deduction in marks to hopefully be able to get my mark up...but this could potentially end up being a big hit in my mark.
While I'm really mostly pissed at myself for letting this semester get away from me...this might be the very mark-expensive kick in the ass I needed to get my shit together.
So happy hump day all! I'm officially over my semester "hump" and its time to get my shit together.
No comments:
Post a Comment