I don't know if it's just me, and that maybe I'm just so off in my own little universe that I miss entire peoples importance, but occasionally, one of my guilty pleasure websites (ie gossip rags) will start heavily posting about certain 'stars' that I swear I have never heard of. It all happens out of nowhere! And they post about these 'ghost stars' like I should not only know who they are but think their 'totally awesome because their famous'. Prime examples include: The Kardashians, Paris Hilton, and Ke$ha.
Not too long ago my sister and I had a conversation about them during a road trip, and after racking our brains (which are FULL of Hollywood gossip) we could not for the life of us figure out why they are famous,or even who they heck they all are. The great and mighty google machine revealed that The Kardashain daughters are the resultant offspring of Kris Jenner and Robert Kardashian (Who is apparently only famous because he defended O.J Simpson), who were married till 1981, then after Jenner and Kardashian split, Jenner went on to marry Bruce Jenner (and that's how she got the last name Jenner). So thats it. Thats all. That's why their famous. Their dad made sure that O.J. Simpson got to walk free, and the daughters all co-own a clothing company. Awesome. My Dad moves around poop for a living to....does that mean I can be on TV? Bah, next victim please.
Paris Hilton. Ok so I know that she is an heiress to a massive fortune, and that her parents own hotels, but let me just confirm it with my good buddy Wikipedia. Wikipedia reports that she is the great granddaughter or Conrad Hilton, who started the Hilton Hotel chain we know today. Ok....so? Well, Wikipedia also goes on to mention that she is best known for her controversial appearance in a sex-tape. Ok SO have rich parents, get sex tape = CELEBRITY. Also guess it doesn't help to neglect personal hygiene in public (ie all the crotch shots sans knickers). Hmm the further along this journey of celeb identication I get, the better I feel about not knowing these people, it shows that perhaps being under a rock is not the problem but that being out and missing all this bad TV is (or is it?). NEXT!
Ke$ha. Who the devil is this Ke$ha person and why does she get so much bloody radio play time when all she sings about is drinking/drugs/and Michael Jackson Transformations (That 'Don't stop song' annoys the absolute begeesus out of me). I really have no idea on earth where this one came from, but her music is not my flavour, nor is her disturbing public reputation as a 'gardening tool'. Wikipedia to the rescue again! Ok so this story is pretty typical of the pop stars in Hollywood (even though she claims to be a white female rapper under her label, yea right, sure, and Britney Spears was a virgin after even after her break up with JT, uh huh I believe you).
Here's the story: Girl comes from poor family, mother barely gets by and works in a Studio so brings kid to work (well no kidding, daycare is expensive!). Kid plays in studio where mom teachers her everything about music etc. ETC ETC, Ke$ha gets involved with famous singer/rapper Flo Ridda and voila instant star! This is similar to how Jennifer Lopez became famous, as well as other now washed out artists including: Eminemn, Fifty Cent.
So now that I've had my media enlightenment I sit back and think. The majority of people that are famous for reasons I completely do not understand, tend to stick around in the media, Paris Hilton and the Kardashians alone fill up a vast percentage of ONTD posts. Famous people that strive to get where they are and come from nothing, they tend to get 'nothing' in the way of long term gossip blog posting. Scary? I am investing in a tin foil hat as I type.
So all you aspiring Hollywood socialites out there? Unless you're family is loaded, you get on survivor or you have some desire to show yourself having sex on the big screen, change your goals. Go to school, go do something brilliant, and instead of being famous for being called a 'garden tool', you'll go down in the history books as the person who KNEW how to wear underwear, or wear a short dress AND get out of the car in a 'lady like'. Heck of a lot better than being known as the star who puked in someones closet!
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